For everyone who has missed my entries, I must first apologize. Though I’m afraid I cannot make other people produce randomness, I need to look for it. However, this entry should hopefully make up for your disappointment …. I have two full pages of an outline to write about.
Random Items
– We sell aluminum forks that are labelled as SPOONS.
– We sell aluminum spoons that are labelled as FORKS.
Oh dear! I’m afraid that the utensils are having an identity crisis. I mean what if the forks actually believe they need to be used to scoop up soup. Or the spoons believe that they are actually sharp?
[ Of course, knives are exempt from this because a knife could never been anything but sharp … although it can be very useful as a fork as well. ]
I had the most adorable little girl in the other day. She was just five, and she had just had her nails done. My mom was in and was making a huge deal about this little girl’s nails, and the little girl’s mom said, “Go ahead, tell them why your nails are done.”
The little girls looks up shyly and says, “I’m going on a date tonight.”
I’m a little shocked, but the mom quickly tells the little girl to tell me who she’s going with. “I’m going with my daddy!” the little girl exclaims.
I think that that is one of the sweetest and best things to do with your daughters. It’s a great example of how guys should treat girls (and who knows better than Daddy?) and it also creates quality time between the father and daughter.
I get a lot of random requests for balloons, but this was a first for me.
“Could you get me that balloon hanging on the window?”
Which one?
“The one on this front window that’s green and yellow.”
Ma’am, that’s a sign.
Murphy Conspiracy
Yes, Murphy is still up to his old tricks. I think a part of it might be because we are using him to hold raffle money in (definitely come check out the raffle, you potential customers). But anyway, he has been getting crazier and crazier, and I definitely believe he has infiltrated the new computers.
For example, I’m in the middle of two balloon orders on a day when I’m by myself, when both registers decided to stop working. It just showed the little hourglass …. as if Murphy was taunting me … haha, you’re stuck with a ton of balloons …
Or that exact same day, when six balloons decided to fall off the walls? For no random reason!
The worst part is that whenever you replace the register tape, the screen shuts off. This is bad because when the screen is off, Murphy can communicate freely without us seeing him. I’m getting quicker at catching it, but each second is precious to a mastermind like Murphy.
Random Fact
“Did you know that going out with your hair wet has nothing to do with catching a cold?”
One woman was shopping for a wedding bag. As long as they’re not going through the boxes I have, I don’t really mind. Well, this woman was an entirely different story.
“Is this a joke?” she exclaimed, sounding severly offended, like someone had played a sick joke on her.
I look over at the wedding bag she’s holding that reads So Happy for Your’s Wedding. She demands an explanation, and I just said, “Well, it could be a joke; I’m guessing the company just misprinted the bag.”
She huffed away.
Random Fact #2
Got the hiccups? You should use this remedy a customer told me.
“Have someone ask you ‘When’s the last time you saw a white horse?’ You should spend so much time thinking about it, you’ll forget to hiccup.”
Great Cheap Ways to Entertain Yourself
Outside: Put a mentos in a bottle of soda … then run. Very cool looking. Just don’t show this to rowdy teenagers hanging outside the dollar store.
Inside: Microwave marshmellow peeps! You just have to make sure they don’t explode, but they should grow immensely large. I wonder how long it takes to figure out the precise timing …
Windy Conditions [The Cart Stories]
So for any of you who live near the southwest corner of PA, you should realize that it was rather windy last night. Along with the random rain, and possibly hail, it was some weird weather. It’s normally pretty quiet those nights. I wasn’t expecting randomness, but insanity came knocking at my door … or should I say, came rolling in.
I look outside and see an older couple in their car, stopped at an intersection in front of the dollar store. They hadn’t quite reached the stores yet, but there were no cars in sight. I continued to watch, and saw a cart go rolling past them; then, they continued to pull out.
This story deserves its own paragraph.
These two really nice women came in and bought a good amount of items. Following which, they proceeded to their car. The store had people, but I felt like watching the wind outside.
Just as these two women are about to cross the barrier, out of nowhere, a cart comes flying across the parking lot. One of the women bends her knees and puts her hands up, as the cart approaches the speed bump. Upon meeting the speed bump, the cart flies up in the air, flips and hits the woman.
At first, I felt like running out to ask if she was ok. However, her friend was bent over laughing (and the woman soon joined too), that they were, walking along, minding their own business, when out of nowhere, a cart came and hit the woman.
You never thought you had to watch for carts, did you?
Life at Dollar Alley 